Its insinuated that everything gets that little bit harder once you have a child, its pushed at us that we won’t achieve much in our childs first few years of being on this place we call Earth.
I’m here to tell you its completely untrue, Here are my top achievements since I had Little B
1. I wake up every single morning. My eyes may be glued shut & my body still aching form lack of sleep but I actually wake up people! Sound the alarm, let the whole village know!
I am awoken each morning by the alarm clock, it screams ‘WAKE UP MUMMY’. Oh wait no, I’m forced out of my lovely slumber by my now 2 year old son B.
Waking up is a killer when you have a child who wants to feed every 2 hours(that was when B was younger by the way!)
Sometimes I secretly felt like staying in bed all day BUT I manage to wake myself up!
Yay 1 mummy point.
2. I brush my hair every single morning. I know, it doesn’t seem like much but when you’ve had 3 hours of sleep & 6 hours of laying in bed with a cooing newborn its a massive achievement.
Many a time did I think of doing an Amy Winehouse & just going for the beehive never brushed hair look, but I powered on through with the help of my trusty Tangle Teezer. It may not have been clean hair, but my gosh it was smooth and knot free!
3. I eat at least once a day. Again it doesn’t seem like a huge deal but a certain child would only nap on me when he was a baby. OH & those naps lasted 2 hours a pop. Now he has me running after him like a fart in a trance so I eat as much as possible when I can.
4. Remembering to brush my teeth is an award worthy accomplishment. The few times I did forget I woke up in the night in cold sweats screaming ‘I forgot to brush my teeth!’.OKAY OKAY, I may have a slight compulsion when it comes to my teeth!
5. I will wear at least one item of clothing without a child related stain on it, now this wasn’t so easy when B was a baby as I usually was LITERALLY covered in poo but now he’s older I tend to just have a food stain or chocolate stain on one item of clothing haha. I count one stain as a victory!
6. I do a whole Tesco shop with my son, yep thats right, an entire Tesco shop!
I may have left out the fact that I keep my son on side by giving him treats & buying him certain things as we go around.
MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, some of those items get left on the shelves whilst he’s not watching but usually he’s more aware than I realise & clocks me sometimes. I usually get away with good snacks & some bubbles though.. oh & a surprise egg.
7. I’ve gone from swearing like a Sailor to casual ‘not sweary swears’. I am hugely proud of the change.
I decided to make up non-swearing swears, ‘you fluffy waffle’, ‘You eejit’ & whatever else pops into my head. A casual ‘arsehole’ or ‘knobhead’ will creep in sadly but I manage to disguise them with other less offensive ‘fluffy’ words.
Whilst he’s sleeping though, my sailor creeps back in. Bed time is Kayleigh swear time!
I hope I made you laugh, it made me giggle writing it!
Love Me x