My name is Kayleigh & I’m a single parent to my 3 year old son B, I’ve been single 4 years now, pretty much since I got pregnant with the bundle of joy we all refer to as B.
I was told no man would want me because I’d be a single parent, I felt for so long that this was true. I had no luck with men & just assumed that that’s how it was going to be forever.
This post is purely for you men who are going to be dating single mums or you women who are going to be dating single fathers.
So you’ve decided you find me attractive & you like me enough to spend a considerable amount of time with me, you call when you can & ask how I am. Yet you never mention my child.
We talk & you hear my son speaking in the background, I reply & make a comment to you. Instead of replying you will change the subject.
I talk about him & what we have planned & you start talking about us but no mention of him.
It soon becomes clear to me that even though you knew he was around before you decided I was good enough to talk to, you’ve decided you’d prefer if he wasn’t around. This is when I stop talking & leave you to your own devices.
The above scenario isn’t fair, you’ve chosen a woman or man with a child & you should understand they come first & are the priority. They are NOT to be ignored, they exist & existed before you.
Adjusting to having a child around in your life that isn’t yours & may at first be hesitant isn’t easy but if you like the person enough then you should stick with it.
We are not to be picked up & dropped, we don’t have the time & if you are introduced to our children it isn’t right either.
We would rather be told the truth from the start & not waste our precious time if you are going to drop us when you realise, actually, it isn’t for you.
What I’m trying to say is it isn’t all fun & games when theres a child involved & there are false hopes of a relationship given.
We aren’t all in it for a relationship, some people just want fun without involving the child which is fine, issues arise when a relationship is entered into the equation where the other party isn’t interested in the child.
I’ve had men tell me to leave my son at home so they can meet me.
I’ve had people tell me to just go out, that I need the break & they can help me.
It’s clear from the offset for me that these are plain & simple waste men so no time has been wasted.
I have however got close to people only for them to change their minds, they haven’t met my son they are just simply put off by me having my own child.
Let’s say it clearly, be honest, don’t lie, if its not for you don’t start the relationship!
It’s really not hard & for all involved listening to the above is the best way of dealing with a situation like this.
Single parents can make absolute amazing partners so don’t write us off so quickly!